Friday, October 22, 2010

Way to break a mother's heart #287

Abby likes to sleep in bed with us. She's liked this for quite some time. She starts out in her own bed but sometime in the wee hours of the morning she wanders over to our room, her pink bear clutched in her hands to climb in to bed with us.

Thing is, she's quite a bit of a bed hog. I swear that she takes up more room than J-L and I put together. And, as a result, oftentimes one of the parents ends up in her bed in order to get some sleep.

Honestly, I don't mind it that much. My girl has never been much of a hugger, lap-sitter, hand-holder or anything that involves physical touch. And yet at night she will nuzzle right in to my neck and for a moment I feel about as loved as a mother can get. Her father on the other hand? Yeah, he gets the other end. The kicking, the pushing. It makes for a rough night of sleep for him on a lot of occasions.

That brings us to earlier this week. He's had enough and he discusses with Abby the idea of compromise and how we can come to a solution that works for all of us. Several ideas are thrown around but in the end it's decided that for this week she can come to bed with us every night at 1 am. Next week? 2 am. And so on. The idea is that eventually she will be weened off altogether.

Last night she comes to our bed around 12:15. As agreed upon, J-L asks her to go back to her bed until 1 am. Sadly but obediently she heads back to her bedroom.

I lay there awake listening to her coughing in her bed.

12:44am: I'll just go in and peek on her.

I walk in to the room to see my daughter crouched on her bed, staring intently at the clock. I ask her what she's doing and she bursts in to tears. I know what she's doing. And my heart breaks.

That visual of her digital clock glowing red on her face as she tries to will the time to pass is not one that will leave me quickly.

I climb into bed with her and brush her hair away from her wet cheeks.


Anonymous Nichole said...

Oh that sweet little peach! :(

P was having staying-in-bed issues until we bribed her with a leapster.

10:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All 3 of our kids have done this, and for people so small, they really do take over the bed! For each one of them, I would eventually put a mattress of blankets on the floor beside my side of the bed. Then they would just bring their pillow and blanket in and curl up down there. That way they were still near us, I could reach down and hold theeir hand, and stroke their hair, but I was not sleeping with one foot on the floor to keep myself from being pushed off the bed! Not sure if this will help with Abby or not though....but it does eventually subside! (and then you kinda miss it)

12:09 AM  
Blogger K,W,G and D said...

Cute, heartbreaking and strong all in one go.

5:43 AM  
Anonymous Pat said...

Cynthia, your blog brought back memories of the same sort of situation with my kids and tears to my eyes. As a Mom you never forget those emotional times . The scene is etched into your memory, so precious ,so moving . We are privileged and blessed to be MOMS :)

11:11 AM  
Blogger pamero said...

Good weaning plan! But yeah, I'm not surprised by Abby's dedication! Sometimes you just gotta break from the plan. Especially when tears and late nights are involved.

5:17 PM  

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